NHS COVID 19 vaccine advice
By Baldmichael Theresoluteprotector’ssondate
The NHS has apparently drafted some new guidance on vaccines to allay fears among the general public. A mole within the organisation supplied the draft guidance information sheet in advance of its publication. I thought you might wish to be aware.
It is believed that this information has been disseminated from the WHO, the World Health Organization, so it is possible that your own health agency from whichever country you are from may be preparing a similar document.
It is only a draft and therefore contains text struck through. As to what final form it will take we shall have to wait and see.
Draft NHS vaccine advice June 2023.
The latest scientific advice continues to stand that the COVID 19 vaccines are safe and effective. Please do not believe what the misinformation sites tell you and any documentation they provide including this one.
There have been concerns raised by certain members of the public regarding side effects they have experienced. This document sets out the primary concerns raised to encourage you that all is well and going according to World Economic Forum’s your government’s plan for its your good wealth health.
Possible side effects
Death
If after injection you are dead, do not worry, this is a normal side effect and means the vaccine is working. There is no need for you to advise us of this.
Should your relatives advise us of your demise we shall record this carefully in our database for analysis which can be viewed on our website if you can find the data carefully hidden in the tables.
If you have no relatives do not be alarmed, your personal belongings and assets will become the property of the state and will go to fund politician’s salaries pharmaceutical research and medics’ salaries for new deadly lifesaving vaccines.
Heart problems, neurological disorders and cancer
If after injection you only have heart problems, neurological disorders and cancer we apologise as the vaccine is not working as well as it should.
However, you need not be alarmed as there are more vaccines in the pipeline to try and make sure it works next time.
We therefore recommend you get boosted and try again.
If your heart problem is causing you concern the NHS can help you with money making lifesaving drugs such as Satan’s statins which we shall be happy to provide for you for the rest of your life free of charge paid for by the taxpayers.
If neurological disorders are the side effect such as multiple sclerosis (MS), Parkinson’s and myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME) , many charities are researching the causes. A breakthrough is expected any time and pigs might fly.
In the meantime if you are incapable of movement then we do have wheelchairs. These can be motorised although these are can very expensive and your house may need to be sold to buy one of the latest versions.
If cancer has been diagnosed following vaccination then the good news is that we have many lifesaving drugs generally called chemotherapy. You will be able to undergo an extensive and highly expensive course of highly poisonous lifesaving drugs.
If you have concerns about possible side effects of chemotherapy then there is the option of immuno-therapy which is different as it only contains ingredients similar to the vaccines.
As the vaccines are safe and effective the immuno-therapy can be relied upon for similar results.
Cancer research funding is always essential and charities set up by big pharma have relied on your support for many decades. A breakthrough is expected soon and has been for many decades now.
Other minor side effects such as insanity, loss of balance, loss of employment
If insanity is an issue we have various prison camps safe facilities set up around the country run by the Gestapo highly efficient staff. They will look after your every need and make sure you don’t escape get sufficient exercise in a safe environment.
They are poorly well trained and poorly paid and will administer suitable lifesaving neuro-toxic drugs to calm you and make you dependant on them for the rest of your life.
You are free to choose whether to take these drugs but if you don’t we will tie you down and forcibly inject them.
However, it is the management’s responsibility to make sure that the environment for all patients and staff is safe and secure and it may be necessary to ensure that you do take the medication prescribed as otherwise big pharma will lose money.
Psychopaths Physiatrists and psychologists are available, subject to lockdown restrictions, to help talk through your mental problems. They are well qualified to help you as they have suffered mental breakdowns themselves and are more insane than you are.
If loss of balance is an issue then try walking along a busy road. If this does not cure you then being run over by a juggernaut may solve all your problems.
If you have lost your job over a side effect you can always go on benefits for the rest of your life which will keep you alive at subsistence level at best least.
We trust this guidance is of assistance and if you need help please do not hesitate to contact us via email at
or the following number:
00-666-666-666
If calling please state Mark of the Beast your National Insurance number and Satan an assistant will be with you shortly.
There you are. I hope that is helpful. There is a website link but for some strange reason it doesn’t work. Here it is anyway.
https://www.nhs.uk/covid-19-advice-and-services/loadofbollux
P.S. These links may be helpful.
Lies you’re told about the COVID vaccine (NHS approved)
What is the ‘flu a.k.a Covid 19 and why vaccines are pointless at best.
Statins – are they really good for the heart?
British Heart Foundation – what are they saying about Covid 19 and vaccines?
Gotta love your tongue in cheek humour... that hits the nail on the head.
Well said.