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Factscinator's avatar

📢 PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT 📢

Hear me now. Hear me now. 🎤

Booyakasha.

Dis is Ali G speakin’ on behalf of da public, da streets, an’ anyone who don’t like snakes in shiny suits 🐍👔

Today I gotta tell you ‘bout one man, yeah.

Name of BaLdmichael 🕵️‍♂️

An dis bruv? His nose ain’t just decorative. Nah.

Dat ting sniffin’ out nonsense like it owe him money 👃💨

You got man out here pushin’ toxic jabs for viruses dat only exist in CG 💉📊

BaLdmichael smell dat.

You got politicians on da take, pockets jinglin’ louder than they principles 💼💸

BaLdmichael smell dat.

You got wrong’uns hidin’ behind charities, titles, an “respectable society” vibes 🚫👀

BaLdmichael smell dat too.

An when he catch you?

No handcuffs. No courtroom drama.

Nah nah nah.

He just take your name…

Flip it…

Shake it…

An let da letters do da talkin’ 🔤😬

Suddenly BOOM 💥

You exposed as a bottom-feedin’, ethics-vacant, integrity-missin’, badge-polishin’, morals-for-rent operator

All revealed not by opinion…

But by SPELLING 🧠✨

So remember people 🫵

If you push poison, touch kids, or take envelopes from da wrong briefcase 💉🚫💼

You ain’t goin’ jail, blud.

You gettin’ ANAGRAMIZED. 🧠🔥

BOOYAKASHA 💥😎

Baldmichael's avatar

I have to say that is very good indeed. I am greatly honoured and bow my head to you. Please excuse the bald patch.

Factscinator's avatar

LOL!! 🤣 Respec’, bruv. 🙏

Much appreciated! 👍🎉

Kerry's avatar

LMAO! Brilliant. My mother-in-law lives in one of the ghettos in Staines!

Factscinator's avatar

😂😎 Staines Ghetto… SAY. NO. MORE.

🚨 PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT 🚨

Hear me now. Hear me now. 🎤📡

Scene: Ali G crouched in da pirate radio bedroom broadcasting live — mattress on da wall, duvet over da mic, finger waggin’, big nod.

WUBWUBWUBWUB 🚁 (Ali doin’ helicopter wit his mouth, bruv)

Respec for da love, bruv 🙏

Big up Kerry’s mum-in-law, holdin’ firm in da frontline borough of STAINES 🏙️😤

Dis be a COMMUNITY CALL FOR PEACE 📻🛏️💥

(G's mum shoutin’ “ALI! TURN IT DOWN!” from downstairs — innit)

📢 YO STAINES MASSIVE — LISTEN UP 📢

East side 👉😎👈 West side

Allow da bang-bang ting 🔫❌

Dead dat spillin’ blood business ❌🩸

Fix up on da mugginz an da bin-lurkin’ nonsense 🧥🗑️

Pattern up — hoodie creepin’ an’ funny business? Not in da Azda Car Park, ya get me? 👀

Dis ain’t dat kind of night, yeah?

Instead… we choosin’ PEACE ON DA STREETS ✌️

An’ peace start by SERVIN’ KERRY’S MUM-IN-LAW, bruv 💖

East side: carry dem shopping bags like certified gentlemen 🛍️🤝 — yeah, I said, certified, bruv!

West side: hold dem doors like trained professionals 🚪😎 — big respect!

East side: paint da gaff fresh-fresh, magnolia vibes 🎨🏠 — lookin’ proper, innit

West side: trim dem hedges crisp-cut 🌿✂️ — no messin’ around

All sides: escort her to Tesco like she royalty 👑🛒☔ — VIP ting, ya get me?

Ali rewind da track ⏪⏪⏪

WUBWUBWUBWUB 🚁 (helicopter again, hypin’ da massive)

Final scene… slow-mo settings 🎬

East side an West side layin’ down da bang-bang tools on mum’s lawn 🚫🔫🌱

Everyone graftin’ together — paintin’, plantin’, decoratin’ 🌸🪴🖌️

Full-time VIP bodyguard service to Tesco an back. No beef. Extra bags. 😎

BOOYAKASHA 💥

Peace on da streets ✌️

Respec’ to da mums, aye 💐

STAINES MASSIVE — MAKE IT NICE, YEAH? 😄

Kerry's avatar

Hahahaha! Love it! You is on a roll bruvva.

Factscinator's avatar

👍👍 MASSIVE THANKS 🙏👍🎉

John Roberts's avatar

Interesting article as always, plus I learned a few things.

My favorite anagram that fits like a well tailored suit !!!

“Please note that ‘medical professionals’ anagrams to:

- dismal fecal poisoners”

Baldmichael's avatar

Thanks John. As to 'medical professionals' I am working on a post mainly around the anagrams of the phrase 'medical profession'. It is a stuggle as there are so many suitable phrases that make one think it is is really not a good thing to be part of it!

Kerry's avatar

So funny. But very few did their own research. I checked on Fizzer and they were very proud to say what they were adding in at one stage. By the time arguments kicked off with the family who demanded I prove it. I gave them the links, but the website had been changed. Sure wish I'd thought of screen shots. Apart from the MRNA - it was the HEK - was it HEK2? No way Jose!! Now family members (not close ones) have gone plus a few friends. The more recent ones still kept taking the poison. Ah well, I'll probably get run over by a tractor!

Baldmichael's avatar

Ah yes, the taking of screen shots or indeed print as pdfs as evidence. I try and do this where info might change or if I engage on someones website where they may delete commnets.

Sorry about your family and friend losses.